


Let Me Lay Here and Tell Me, Where did I Go Wrong?

by KawaMunuera



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, Developing Friendships, F/M, One Shot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-29
Updated: 2014-08-29
Packaged: 2018-02-15 07:57:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2221452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KawaMunuera/pseuds/KawaMunuera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Slade's been defeated, Starling City rises as a new city, where the Arrow is its hero. The city is peaceful and calm, the vigilante doesn't need to hide anymore, he's free... But the truth is, is he? Oliver cannot escape from his demons that keep haunting him down, he's desperate to fight them off. But he doesn't know how to face them until his IT girl shows him what "home" really means.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let Me Lay Here and Tell Me, Where did I Go Wrong?

**Author's Note:**

> So... I'm completely new to this page and this is my first work. Please be gentle!! Basically, this fanfic is based on the promo of Arrow season 3, so if you haven't seen season 2: SPOILER ALERT! I was so excited when it came out that my mind started creating scenarios and here it is, my own version (minimally truthful to the promo) of season3. I just love this pair! Please leave your comments, likes, followings; Everything is highly appreciated. Hope you like it!! :) By the way, the song for this chapter is "Unpack your heart" by Phillip Phillips, it really reminds me of Olicity.
> 
> I do not own anything, all the characters and rights belong to the CW Network and DC Comics 
> 
> PS: Sorry for possible mispellings, I'm not a native english speaker!

 

 

 

Meet me where the sunlight ends  
Meet me where the truth never bends  
Bring all that you're scared to defend  
  
And lay it down when you walk through my door  
Throw all of it out on the floor  
Your sorrow, your beauty, your war  
I want it all, I want it all  
  
Bring your secrets, bring your scars  
Bring your glory, all you are  
Bring your daylight, bring your dark  
Share your silence  
And unpack your heart  
  
Show me something the rest never see  
Give me all that you hope to receive  
Your deepest regret dies with me  
  
The days when you stumble and fall  
The days when you grind to a crawl  
The treasure that hides behind your walls  
I want it all, yeah I want it all

Oh, I'm on your side  
So shed your shadow  
And watch it rise  
Into your darkness  
I'll shine a light

 

And there it was. Again. And again. And again. Oliver was lying on the floor, his hands tied up behind his back. In front of him, on theirs knees, his mother and his sister both crying and begging him for answers. Before he could react, his mother was talking to Slade, telling him to take her life instead of her children. For one single second Slade hesitated and he hoped that maybe he would let them live. He was wrong. Time seemed to slow down, and his mother fell in front of him, her heart broke in two. Lifeless. The tears clouded his vision, but he managed to give Slade one last look, full of revenge. But what he found wasn't Slade, it was himself, dressed as the Arrow, staring down at him and his broken family. This macabre version of himself was wearing a wide grin, teasing him.

"You did this. You put her in this position. It was you who killed her"

"No. You're wrong. It was Slade" he barely whispered.

"Are you sure about that? Who killed Shado? Him? You? Answer me!! Who?!" 

He was going to deny it again, but a tight knot inside his chest told him the whole truth. The Arrow was right. He might not had been behind the murder weapon, but he was the killer. He was a murderer.

Felicity woke up as a scream filled her little apartment. She sat down, almost falling from the bed, and before she could think about her actions, she was running to her living room, where a broken Oliver Queen lay on her couch. His big frame was shaking as sweat was pouring down his tensed and muscled body. He was mumbling words and screaming. She knew the danger she was in by just standing a few feet from him, but she didn't hesitate. In a second she wrapped her arms around him and tried to wake him up. Seeing him like this, killed her.

At first, Oliver, didn't do anything. He kept talking and screaming, not paying attention to the little IT girl that was hugging him with all her strenght. But then it happened. His instincts kicked in and he got up and pushed her as hard as he could until she was pinned against the wall.

Felicity knew the risks of doing such an stupid thing, but she took them anyway. That's why, when her back hit the wall of her living room, she let out a cry. Just one. Though it hurt. She just gasped until she felt his body tense and then release. She knew he would try to go away once he realized that he had hurt her. That was exactly what she was expecting and her only reaction was to secure her arms around Oliver's broad sholders.

"Hey, it's ok. You're safe. It's me, Felicity. You're ok. Don't worry. Just breathe. Come on. Breathe" she whispered against his ear.

He finally let out a shaky breath and relaxed against her. His arms hugging her like she would vanished. But she didn't. She never did. And never would. After a few minutes that felt like hours, she broke the embrace, just enough to slide her hand into his calloused one and walked him to the couch. She almost forced him to sit down, but when he did he didn't dear to look at her. He knew what he would find. Concern, worry, that need to help... But he didn't deserve any of that. He didn't deserve her.

Oliver was staring blankly at his lap when two fingers came to rest under his chin and turned his head in her direction. Forcing him to stare at her green eyes filled with pain and concern.

"Oliver" she whispered.

He just stared. He couldn't answer her, not when his voice would broke. She tried again.

"Oliver. Talk to me" she begged. "What happened?"

He shook his head.

"Nothing. I'm fine" he didn't believe a single word that escaped his lips, and she knew that. She could see right through him.

"You were screaming" she waited for him to say anything, bu when he didn't she kept going. "That's not nothing. It was a nightmare, wasn't it?" He slightly nodded. 

"Was it about your mother?"

He just caught his breath, but that was more than enough to make her know she had hit a soft spot. She just squeezed his hand and waited. She was extremely pacient with him, he noticed. She never pushed him. He sighed loudly.

"It was that night, you know, the night that she..." She squeezed again to make him know that she understand. "This time was different, though. Slade wasn't the one who killed her. It was me. The Arrow was holding that sword and... I just..." He dropped his gaze.

Felicity got quickly his train of thought and stopped him right on his tracks.

"Hey, Oliver. Look at me" he didn't "Please. Look at me"

He did and what he found in her eyes surprised him. It was... That was anger?

"Now. I don't want to hear ever again that everything that happened was your fault. Because the truth is, it wasn't. You heard me? That crazy psycopath did something unthinkable and unforgivable, but you stopped him. Not Oliver Queen nor the Arrow, but you" she cupped his cheek with one hand and with the other pointed right at his heart. "I told you once. Everything that happened came to life because you were a killer. Not anymore. The man I see right now is nowhere close to that definition. You're a good man, Oliver Queen. And you need to see it for yourself, so stop putting blame on your shoulders. You have people around you that can help you carry that burden"

He just stared at her with awe. How did she do it? How did she see so good in him? The person that she described was far away from the man he saw as himself, but still... Hearing her say it out loud made him want to believe it. He wanted to become that man. For her. He couldn't disappoint her.

"Thanks" he murmured. He put his hand in hers and smiled lightly.

Felicity, finally satisfied, stood up and dragged him along to the kitchen. She left him standing near the counter and kept going to fill two glasses of water. 

This nights were becoming a rutine, Felicity realized. When five months ago Slade had been taken care of and secluded in a prison in Lian Yu, Oliver found himself without home or money or family. Completely alone. Not really alone, of course he had Felicity and Diggle. But the face that Oliver showed to the world didn't include any of his friends. To the entire world he was a homeless and poor ex-billionaire. Without a house he crashed in the lair for a couple of weeks, sleeping in a cold basement. Not an ideal place to sleep, according to Felicity's opinion. Dig offered him his apartment a couple of times but with the great news about the baby coming he didn't want to bother Dig or Lyla. Felicity, after a lot of thought and running all the possible scenarios in her head, started pushing him to stay with her until he found someplace better. After a lot of discussion and "loud voice" he accepted her offer and became Felicity's new roommate. The thing was, he didn't find any place better for him to stay. For the last five months they had been growing closer. They found themselves relying on each other all the time. Felicity helped him with his nightmares and Oliver helped her train and lose that fear that seemed to have taken control over her every time she was alone. After that night when Slade hold a blade at her neck, everything crushed down on her like a heavy weight. She finally saw how vulnerable and weak she was when it came to fighting. Stabbing that needle in Slade's neck was something that Felicity never thought would be able to do, but that night fear and adrenaline were controlling her brain and motions. She didn't think, she just acted. And that was what scared her the most. She always thinked. Always. She needed to regain control over her emotions and functions to be able to fight back and defend herself. 

This was their routine: training, eating, talking, nightmares, and sleeping. The city was completely calm and the Arrow wasn't needed. The police erased the department that chased after the vigilante, and Oliver was recognized as a hero, though he didn't accept it or didn't want to acknowledge it. She couldn't tell for sure.

Oliver watched her as she retrieved two glasses from the closet and filled them with water. She turn around to give him the glass when an expression that he couldn't place hit her face and a cry escaped her lips. He reached to her quickly and grabbed her waist, stabilizing her. She was shaking.

"What's wrong?" He said, concern filled his voice. She was looking down, avoiding his gaze. Oliver didn't understand, what happened? The truth hit him right in the face. He recalled what had happened after he woke up and let go of her, afraid he would hurt her again.

"I'm so sorry, Felicity. It won't happen again. Tomorrow I'm leaving and you will be safe. I'm-"

"Say you're sorry one more time and I promise, I will hit you" she said cutting him off. She finally met his gaze and though her eyes were shining from unshed tears she was smiling. "I'm fine. Just hurts when I move it too much. Nothing that won't heal"

She just smiled again and passed Oliver to go sit on the couch. He just watched her. Why didn't she run away and never look back? Anyone in their right mind would run in this situation. But Felicity...

"By the way, that thing about you leaving tomorrow, not happening. The only reason you would leave this apartment is if I kick you out. And kicking you out is not happening anytime soon. So sit down and enjoy because we're stuck together" she said. She realized what she said and blushed "I mean, not stuck together like together together. Not that I would mind that but you're my boss and... Not that that would stop me from starting a relationship with you, just... I'm gonna stop talking right now. I'm rambling again"

He couldn't help it, he just grinned. Her rambling always made him smile. Some people may found it annoying or stupid, but he just found her rambling adorable. He sat down next to her and chuckled. She released a breath that didn't realize she was holding and leaned back on the couch. Seeing him smile was a good think.

"What are you laughing at?" She teased, trying to sound angry.

  
"You're remarkable, Felicity Smoak" he said.

  
She blushed again and smirked.

  
"Thanks for remarking on it. May I ask for what?"

"For not kicking me out and being there for me. Thank you" he said. Before she could reply he caught her glass and left it on the coffee table "Now, let me see that shoulder" 

"No, it's not really necessary. I'm fine" she quickly lied.

"Come on. Take off your shirt" she flushed again and shook her head. "Don't make me do it for you, young lady" he laughed.

"It's not funny, Oliver" she was so red that she tried to hide it by looking away.

Felicity couldn't believe what he asked her. Take off your shirt. She had to admit she had dreamed about him saying her that in a less painful situation. _Oh, pull it together Smoak!_ she thought. _Not the time._ She could feel her face burn even more, if that was even possible. She was about to make the step when suddenly Oliver stripped his shirt off. He was shirtless. That image made her head spin and she grabbed the pillow next to her to regain balance.

"Come on. Now you take it off and we'll be even" he grinned.

"You are enjoying yourself, aren't you?"

"Maybe" he chuckled.

Felicity took a deep breath and started taking her shirt off. The single movement of lifting her arms send shivers through her. Her right shoulder burned like hell. Once her left arm was out of the sleeve she tried to pull out the right but pain ran through her like electricity and couldn't help but growl. Oliver moved forward and quickly placed one hand on her waist and another on her right upper arm to help her get it out. Felicity freeze. Oliver Queen was touching her bare-skinned waist.

Oliver sensed Felicity tense underneath his touch. He didn't really think about it, he just saw her in pain and tried to help. He quickly pulled away once her shirt was out and, to his surprised, blushed. Felicity couldn't help but feel disappointed when his hand left her waist, leaving a burning touch that send shivers up and down her spine.

"I'm sorry" he quickly added " I didn't mean to..."

"No, no, no. It's ok. Your hands were cold and it startled me" she lied "That's all"

Both of the them would lie if they tried to deny the tension and attraction that had been growing between them the last five months. Since the "I love you" moment they avoided situations that implied physical contact or where emotions were involved. They both knew that whatever they had going on couldn't happen, for the sake of the team and everything.  But they knew all of that was bullshit, just excuses to stop themselves before things went out of control.

Felicity was concerned that her friendship with him would be damaged and the team dynamic'd be affected. But her main concern was that he wouldn't feel the same way about her. He had been her crush for so long that she wasn't sure of anything anymore. She was well aware that her feelings for him had skyrocketed to a level that she was hundred percent sure that she was completely in love with Oliver Queen.

Oliver, on the other hand, was concerned about her safety. She was already in danger and being with her in a more intimate and personal way would only put her right in the bulls-eye. He didn't want her there, he cared to much and knew that if anything happened to her he would never forgive himself. He would lost it. He couldn't live without her, not anymore. She was the part of him that he was missing, his light in the darkness. She put him out of his misery, helped him, never judge him, called him on his shit whenever was necessary and even risk her own life to wake him from his terrifying nightmares. He loved her, but he didn't know if that was the right thing to do. He didn't deserve her. She deserved someone better, though the thought of Felicity with someone else made his blood rush.

"Oliver, you're staring" she barely whispered. Her face blushing.

"Huh? Oh! Sorry, I was just thinking" he stared at does green pools that he loved "Turn around so I can see your back"

She did as he asked. Felicity was wearing a simple black bra, but the intimacy of the moment made her feel exposed, really exposed.

Oliver gasped when he saw it. Her right shoulder blade was already bruising and her white skin was now purple. It was worse than he thought.

Felicity might had heard him gasp because she said "Is it too bad?"

"Worse than I thought" his voice was filled with pain and guilt.

Felicity quickly turn around and grabbed his hand. "Hey, it's ok. It's not your fault. I knew how dangerous was to try to wake you up, but I did it anyway. I'm completely responsible for my acts. Stop blaming yourself" she said, holding his head between her hands.

He stared at her and breathed deeply, pulling himself together. This was unforgivable, but she seemed to forgive him and that relaxed him.

"Thanks. I really needed that. Ok, turn around. I believe you have some pain killers in the bathroom"

She nodded and waited for him to come back from the bathroom. When he did he sat down again and gave her two pills and a glass of water. She swallowed them without blinking. 

"Felicity, I'm going to need to touch your shoulder blade to make sure nothing is broken. You're okay with that?"

"Sure. I'm fine with you touching me" she blushed again "I mean, I'm fine with you touching my shoulder, not that you touching me at all wouldn't be okay with me... And please feel free to stop me anytime before I say something even more embarassing"

"Even more?" He chuckled.

  
She hit him right in the chest just to make him laugh even harder.

  
"Oliver! It's not funny! You drug me and now you take advantage of me! Oh, damn! I'm just going to shut up"

The fact that she hid her face in her hands made Oliver laugh louder. A moment later, Felicity was laughing too. His laughter was something she barely heard, but she loved it and the sound was so intoxicating, that melted her.

"Enough now" he said pretending to sound serious "Let's see how bad it is"

  
Felicity decided to stare at the wall in front of her and hold herself together the best way she could while Oliver's hands explored her back. Wherever he placed his hands, he left behind a burning touch that made Felicity shiver. When Oliver reached her shoulder and touched she winced in pain. She was praying that Oliver didn't notice it so he could stop blaming himself, but this wasn't her lucky day. She felt the tension rolling off of him like a heatwave.

"What's the verdict?" She asked.

"Not broken but it will hurt for a while. I... I'm so..." She quickly turn around and placed a finger on his lips.

"I know. Forget about it. Now, since you're my doctor, can I have your approval and go to sleep? The pills are kicking in and I really want my bed" Oliver snorted and nodded.

He wasn't going to sleep, he just couldn't.

Felicity slowly stood up and couldn't help but yawn, she was more tired than she expected. She was almost in her bedroom when suddenly stopped. She was forgetting something, but her sore body and tired mind couldn't figure it out. She looked around and found Oliver sitting on the couch. He was extremely tensed and avoiding her eyes. She then realized what was missing, Oliver wasn't going to sleep tonight and the bags under his eyes showed how many nights he had spend wandering around her apartment. Normally the nightmares that he had didn't involve screaming extremely loud in the middle of the night. He usually screamed and by the time Felicity was getting up to check on him, Oliver was already awake and reassuring her that he was fine. Just one night happened the same thing as tonight, and he admitted to her that he didn't want to be alone. She didn't hesitate and spend the whole night with him watching TV until they fell asleep. But tonight was different, Felicity was so tired that she needed sleep, so she didn't really think of what she was saying until it was already too late to take it back. 

"Hey, aren't you coming or what?" She said between yawns. He tilted his head and look confused. Felicity explained the obvious "We both now you are not going to sleep tonight and since any of us want to be alone and I'm extremely tired and I want to sleep, you're coming to bed with me" Oliver brows raised but his eyes were filled with gratitude. "I'm really tired and probably tomorrow I will regret getting in bed with you because things will get even weirder, but I don't care. Besides I'm rambling while my brain is shutting down so you may want to stop me, because that combination is really dangerous. So" another yawn "Can we sleep now?"

Oliver smiled widely and followed her to the bed. When he stepped in her bedroom she was already under the covers sighing happily. He jumped on the other side and looked at her, she seemed asleep.

"Good night, Felicity" he murmured.

"Night, Oliver"

With those words in her mouth she rolled over and rested her head on his chest while her arm placed itself on his waist and their feet entangled together. Oliver almost jumped at the sudden contact. They were both shirtless and that thought made Oliver blush. He knew Felicity would panic if they woke up like this, but he was extremely comfortable and for once in a long time he felt safe. He wasn't letting go of her. Not a chance. 

 


End file.
